Countless God’s children have continued to make grave and heartbreaking mistakes in their marriage partner selection. It is no longer a surprise that people make the wrong choice in a life partner and spend the rest of their lives regretting that decision or, worse still, getting divorced.
One of the major reasons for this is that most of these people do not seek God’s consent before making their choices. They chose their partners without God’s guidance. Nevertheless, time has proven that no matter how experienced and knowledgeable you may be in other areas of your life, you still need God’s leading to choose the right partner.
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You need God’s guidance in choosing a life partner because he is omniscient. He knows and sees what you cannot. Your perfection is not enough, and it can be influenced by emotional strain and stress. God is eternal and cannot be deceived because He knows all things even before they exist.
God knows who is best suited for you in marriage, and he also knows who is not. Therefore, whomever He forbids you to marry, He has a reason for doing so. He does not consider physical appearances or prosperity like we do most often. This means that even a well-behaved, religious, and diligent churchgoer may not be suitable for you.
Someone may check all the boxes and appear physically satisfactory and may even be very intelligent, but they lack the discipline, temperance, and selflessness that would enable the two of you to live in peace. He or she may have the wealth and industry, but they lack the character of Christ.
Making the Wrong Choice
Marriage between a born-again Christian and an unconverted person is a disaster, regardless of how much tongue that person speaks. Many people make the wrong choices by thinking they can change their partners after marriage. Unfortunately, this has never worked. It is risky to think that you would lead your partner to Christ after marriage. Instead, it is wiser to lead your partner to Christ before your marriage.
The danger is that your partner may turn you away from following God or influence you to serve other gods. Believers who have made such mistakes have either lost their ministries or died prematurely.
“Neither shalt thou make marriages with them; thy daughter thou shalt not give unto his son, nor his daughter shalt thou take unto thy son. For they will turn away thy son from following me, that they may serve other gods: so will the anger of the LORD be kindled against you, and destroy thee suddenly”
Deuteronomy 7:3-4
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Similarly, it is dangerous to marry someone who would become a snare or scourge for you. To marry such people is synonymous with exposing yourself to an early grave. Many beautiful people out there are devils incarnate who will put you through unimaginable hardships that you cannot tell others about because of the wrong choice you made.
Making the wrong choice because of wealth and riches is another issue destroying so many marriages today. You should be courageous enough to reject a proposal from a wealthy and good-looking person when you are certain that God would not support such a marriage. Do not be enticed by fake peace or wealth presented before you to sway you. These things should not be the basis for you to accept marrying any person because they are capable of weakening your strength over time. They will surely cause you to offend God, weaken your spiritual life, or make you a candidate for hell. Even wealth can fade away!
An evil partner is capable of making a strong person weak and a weak person even weaker. They can turn the righteous to unrighteousness and help the wicked commit horrible things in the sight of God. Jezebel in the Bible turned her husband, Ahab, into a wicked king. She stirred up evil in Ahab’s heart, and he did abominable things as a king that nearly destroyed him.
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It is a high risk to marry an unbeliever who has no desire to fear or love God. Likewise, Solomon ruined his love for God when he entered into ridiculous marriages with unbelievers. Thus, it is wrong to marry an unbeliever or someone who is not compatible with you. Such a union has the potential to divert your attention away from your life and reduce you to nothing. Women who do not believe in God are usually characterized as having strange and wicked characters, flattering lips, and no regard for the covenant with God.
Such women are guided by demons. They can insult their husbands and disobey any authority figure without fear of repercussions. They obey the commands of evil spirits more than their partners’ or God’s, and at the command of or under the influence of evil spirits, they humiliate their partners without mercy.
And so, as a believer, you do not have any reason to marry an unbeliever who does not have a heart to repent. In so doing, you expose yourself to high risks. You cannot afford to have confidence in an unbeliever because they are like the wind that you cannot control. The question you should always ask yourself is, “If unbelievers dealt with Solomon, David, and Samson, then who am I that I cannot be dealt with?” More so, who are you to ignore the warnings of God?